5 takeaways from an awful yet not so shocking Cardinals loss

They had several leads throughout the game, though.

I hope someone fucks up Drew VerHagen’s eggs at brunch this morning. The guy has one job on Saturday night, and he screws it up. Have you ever endured a four-sneeze attack late at night before you decide to write? That’s how long it took for VerHagen to screw things up.

Let’s discuss a few takeaways from another not so good, absolutely awful, and positively despicable night of St. Louis Cardinals baseball, circa 2023. Pour a little bourbon in that coffee, and Sunday can start to turn into a fun day… before they take the field again.

Jeff Curry/USA Today Sports

5) The Walker Express

Who is slashing .320/.407/.560 over his last 15 games? Jordan “Pour him another double” Walker. He smashed home run #13 on Saturday, propelling the Cards to a lead they would relinquish less than an hour later. He has seven hits in his last three games, and a few of those have left the rookie as a suspect in a murder case. I’m talking about line drive damage. Hitting .271 with a rising OPS and power numbers this late in the season is a nice sign of adaptation happening on the fly.

This kid’s doing exactly what Nolan Gorman did last year, but better. What will he do in 2024?

4) Definitely not a Rom-Com

Thank you, Baltimore. Drew Rom is a delight. He’s like Jack Flaherty, minus the excuses and whining--and 2019. He’s got time on his side, but his ability to pitch a precise game at the moment is about as spotty as asking someone who has seen Demolition Man only once to explain the three seashells accessory. He’s 23, so there’s time. But sometimes a 115th pick pitches like a 115th pick.

3) Cold as ice isn’t nice, Mr. Nado

Overall, few could pick a big grudge with Nolan Arenado’s 2023 season. But like the team he’s playing for, there’s still going to be a layer of shit attached to it. At the moment, he’s as reliable as Tom Pagnozzi at the plate. If Walker is blasting, Arenado is hitting balls into baseball quicksand. In his last 27 at-bats, he has twice as many strikeouts (4) as hits.

No, I’m not being sportswriter-thrifty with the game collection either. In his last 30 games, Arenado is slugging .356. That’s Tyler O’Neill like every other season, not the work of a man making over $30 million to play a game. Pushing hard on the third baseman is not an agenda I want to have on Sept. 3, but you need more in a season like this from your highest paid player.

If not, trade him. What have the Cardinals won with their two, big flashy toys? ZIP!

2) Mr. Winn hits like Larry Flynt… so far

The prized shortstop’s OPS after Saturday’s game is .401. Hits have been scattered around his first 14 games, including two doubles. Like Rom but with a lot more promise attached, there is a whole lot of time for Masyn Winn. He’s hitting ninth and playing a good shortstop, getting reps that a top prospect needs.

You just wonder what kind of bat he is going to have. Winn is making Paul DeJong look like Francisco Lindor right now, but that can change in a more uplifting and complete 2024 campaign. But I would be remiss to not mention that there is a lot riding on what he can do at a pivotal position. The team holds onto these prospects like they’re a bottle of caviar on a desert island.

If Winn can hit solidly with the high-caliber defense, the Cardinals are golden. If he can’t, then the plans for that position (or others) change.

1) Thank goodness for Nootbaar

The outfielder was smashing his way through August with a .984 OPS when he foul-tipped a baseball off his balls. The balls that really matter, folks. Baseballs have dealt a cruel handful of blows to the private parts of St. Louis players. A baseball is fouled off Juan Encarnacion’s eye, effectively ending his career. A Jordan Hicks fastball is clipped off Yadier Molina’s (better) lower half. Then, Noot goes down on Aug. 16.

While he’s still very tradeable, the guy is an exciting player that should be penciled in next year for 130-140 games if he does clear the offseason trade wire. He put a ball in the seats last night, showing the potential if the injury bug can stay away. Nootbaar will play in a similar amount of games as he did in 2022, and he’s improved on nearly every meaningful category across the statistical board.

Maybe he can help make September less of a drag.

Good morning and goodnight.