Buffa's Buffet: 5 things on my mind

One can call himself a tough guy and not think of himself as a Spartan warrior. The idea of toughness isn't limited to being able to take out three guys with a single pencil; it's more like the impression that I could take care of myself in a fight or exude a gritty edge. But then I come across a dead bird on the cold pavement near my work downtown, and I feel like a young boy figuring out a proper burial idea. 

The point is, toughness comes in many shapes and sizes, but it can't prepare you to handle the end of a once-flying bird's life. Let's get into a few things on my mind this chilly yet hopefully not terrible Wednesday morning. Monday and Tuesday are dead, and this day is already dying. 

To screen or not screen?

The day job has eliminated night moves on my part, at least during the week. The toughest transition for me is figuring out which advance public screenings are worth my time, and which flicks can wait. This is where I can debunk the rumor that people don't need movie reviews anymore. Those are required when you trust a few writers and they see something before you. 

It's not just "good or bad," but what is good about it and what is bad, exactly? The George Clooney-Julia Roberts led romantic comedy, "Ticket to Paradise," was screened last night for critics and audiences. I love both the leads, especially Clooney. They are classic movie stars who can make any material seem watchable. However, a few of the reviews steered me away from handing over my Tuesday night. 

Think about it. I get out of work around 5pm, and usually start passing out around 10pm. Getting up at 6am every weekday morning doesn't allow for an extremely late night. What I used to be able to do is more difficult when there's a set place to be 40 hours a week. Staying up to midnight only makes that morning rush in faster, and the brain is already fried a few hours before that. 

I may have been able to watch anything and everything back in the day of film criticism (especially with Film-Addict), but it's not possible. And to be honest, it's not a bad thing. Getting pickier with what you watch usually sits on the good side of decision-making. Unless you're in the industry and are paid to write reviews, you owe the world of movies zip. See what you want, and fill in the rest later. That's the way. 

Should the Cards have signed Kyle Schwarber last winter?

A resounding yes. You could read a somewhat opposing take on this same newsletter earlier in the year, where I tried to talk myself out of signing Schwarber. But it's a no brainer. The dude smashed 46 home runs and put up an .827 OPS for Philadelphia, and he blasted a 120 mph home run last night to help his team gain a 1-0 NLCS lead over the Padres. 

Schwarber is a better bet than Tyler O'Neill, Dylan Carlson, Alec Burleson, Lars Nootbaar, and Lars' entire family in the outfield at the plate. Put him in the Cards lineup against Philly and the series may be different. He signed a nice deal up east, and the city of brotherly love should be happy. 

Save me the outfield defense argument. You can fish around the league for defenders all you want, but they aren't going to hit like they field. Schwarber will never be a good outfielder but then again, neither was Matt Holliday. You get a bat for the bat, not with the hope of defense to come with it. 

AirPods to the rescue

Every winter movie season, the studios will send screeners to film critics across the country. For Your Consideration discs, a poster or letter, and possibly some merchandise. The merch can be a variety of things, such as a pair of pope slippers ("Two Popes") or one of those big coffee table books detailing the film's production. 

But Apple TV Plus takes the cake. They sent me AirPods last December, a very pricey gift that I have used every day since. Wireless headphones are underrated when it comes to a workout, listening discreetly to a podcast at work, or even just sitting outside in your backyard. They're so good, you can forget that they're in your ears. Apple is still way ahead in the tech game. 

It makes me think back to a great movie directed by Danny Boyle about the life of Steve Jobs. Near the end, Jobs (played brilliantly by Michael Fassbender) tells his daughter that he's going to put music in her pocket. He did that, and now took the cords off my neck. Talk about a legacy that's still building houses in its neighborhood. 

Brett Hull unplugged is a treat

The funny thing about Hull and being unplugged is he's that way every time. Whenever I hear his voice on a radio show, TV show, or podcast, he's cutting loose and holding nothing back. Like thousands of other hockey fans in St. Louis, he got me into the sport and quickly became my favorite player in 1988-89. Watching him make the Old Barn shake is a feeling that will never leave my sports brain.

But what's almost as good as seeing him slice and dice opposing NHL teams for about a decade in St. Louis is his off-the-cuff demeanor. It was visible at the Brentwood Community Center after practice with the press and fans, and it's there every time when he does an interview with a Pat Imig or a podcast duo like Cam Janssen and Andy Strickland. 

Certain athletes just don't care what they say or how they say it, even if Hullie has gotten more measured as he strides towards 60. Wayne Gretzky once told him he loved him because he said all the things Wayne wanted to say. 30-ish years later, nothing has changed. A conversation with Hull can go from his playing days (he really did hate Mike Keenan, but couldn't describe exactly how he clashed with Quennville) to his new cannabis company, to a rant about Trump, Nazem Kadri, and his Cup-winning adventures in Dallas and Detroit. 

"Legendary sound bite creator" should be tacked on Hull's grave, along with "We Went Blues!"

Restaurants SHOULD mix a salad ordered to eat in house

If you order a salad "for here" instead of "to go," they shouldn't bring you a packaged and unmixed salad. That's lazy bullshit. There's nothing worse than getting a salad packed like a cinder block with the smallest cup of dressing. As Bill Burr said, they want me to become an employee and do work after I paid $11 for a small salad. No repeat visit to a place that rhymes with V-Draft. 

Save me the "don't hate on local places" lame response. Nobody supports local mom and pop shops more than my wife and me. But that doesn't place them out of firing range if they do something wrong. They're a business like any other. We're all just out here trying to get through the day without hurting anybody or making an ass of ourselves. 

And finally, I am more worried about consumer goods prices going way up than I was with rising gas prices. The price to get a meal-and I am talking about a single meal-has gotten way out of hand. It was already heading this way before COVID got here. 

Thanks for reading and have a good one. As De Niro said in "Silver Linings Playbook," don't drink too much or hit anybody, and you'll be fine.