Buffa’s Buffet Vol. 101: Kyrou redemption, Gallegos glacier warning, Dodger desperation and a ‘Ferrari’ review tease

Let’s get into it on a work(less)afternoon.

Before we break open the hot plates, or takes, let me acknowledge an error on my part. Monday, you may have received an email for a post that no longer exists. That was a mini podcast that I recorded in my car while on lunch. Sitting inside the Delmar Loop visitor lot, I thought something cool was accomplished. In actuality, something half-baked was sent out.

You only received TWO minutes of a 12-minute recording. That’s like starting a 30-minute episode of television, and giving people a small scene instead. The post was deleted, and the joy of sneaking in a hobby during work was denied.

It does produce a big sense of accomplishment when a weekday article does happen. The Lance Lynn signing article was written at lunch, with the final editing touches being applied right before grabbing some pipe. The Berube firing commentary was mostly written on lunch. By the time I reach home, the idea of laundry and dishes can seem like Mount Everest; writing starts looking like trigonometry.

So, let’s get into the topics that I had briefly discussed in a fresh buffet.

The Kyrou growth technique

It’s quite simple. It doesn’t matter if you don’t say something mean or insensitive, words can still carry intent and create narratives. Young St. Louis Blues winger Jordan Kyrou brought some heat upon his plate when he was asked about the Berube firing.

“No comment. He’s not my coach anymore.”

It may not seem like a slap to the face, but there are much better things to say if you’re Kyrou. You don’t need Crash Davis at your side to think of more respectable things to fly out of your mouth in front of a pool of reporters. He does himself even a smaller amount of favors in the midst of a slow start.

All this does is bring in the bloodhounds who know the relationship between the former head coach and star player with a big contract wasn’t the best. They inch closer and confirm a narrative that only makes Kyrou look bad. Cue the home game that takes place a day later, and the fans boo him.

Post game, Kyrou sings a different tune, weeping and forming a whole new outlook on Berube that makes him look more compassionate. The city eats it up as a mental health stand, and the world moves on.

The Blues won two games and then got their ass handed to them by Tampa Bay last night. Drew Bannister can wheel and deal with the roster, but he can only do as much as Berube did. It won’t change. Kyrou could help and keep up a very recent point trend. Just do it quietly. Actions speak louder than words, especially with $65 million attached.

Shohei Ohtani mania doesn’t make Dodgers look any less desperate

He signed with the Dodgers, and together they worked the current MLB system to allow 98% of a record-setting $700 million deal to be backdated so the team can keep signing and trading for talent. It’s the reason that MLB isn’t rigged in the classic sense, but it sure is far from fair. You got to play the games, but Los Angeles is arranging the runway before planes take off. They stole their much weaker AL counterpart’s stud, and are making sure the rest of baseball gets a late start.

That is something you can interfere with only by interfering with your enjoyment of the game. Watch less of it. That’s the only remedy to make powerful people do what you want. But even then, you still can’t overcome the Dodgers. Everyone knows their 2020 World Series title owns an ugly and obvious asterisk.

John Mozeliak can’t keep up with that kind of spending, but he can strengthen the team in order to stage a future upset. Contending for a wildcard spot is where this team currently sits, and leaning on Giovanny Gallegos may not be wise.

Gallegos glacier ahead?

You see, he was a great get in a brash midseason trade involving Luke Voit that has produced a number of fine seasons in the bullpen. But 2023 revealed cracks in the facade. Gallegos’s WHIP, aka the amount of hits and walks allowed per nine innings, increased its steady incline from .08 to 1.20. The fielding independent pitching (FIP) rose from 2.87 to 4.36. He turns 33 in August. For relievers, that’s a cagey bet for another 55-70 appearances.

They need more relief. News flash: they’re not adding another starter, at least not one you’re reading about in tweets from Jeff Passan. Speaking of which, follow your local STL beat writers in Derrick Goold and Jeremy Rutherford. Anything local and important with the sports teams, they’ll have the scoop.

As I swat two flies that have been flying around my house for days to death, let’s transition into movies and reviews you can expect to find here.

This week, a review of Michael Mann’s Ferrari. I’m in the process of reheating this one on the grill by giving it a second watch since it was first viewed weeks ago. Next week, look for an official ranking of Mann’s films.

Could I catch Aquaman 2 and witness how the previous DCEU regime ends? Maybe.

The new Emma Stone film, Poor Things, opens in St. Louis this weekend. George Clooney directed a film about a rowing team that’s getting ripped by critics. He may want to stick to acting, or do another black and white journalism drama.

Do I want to see these movies? As in an outright desire to seek them out before the tag can be removed…not really. The only reviews that you’ll read here are films I have something to say about and ones I genuinely wanted to review. Anything else, and I’m going through the motions.

Before I go, let’s end with a round of “if I had to say something,” because it’s fun.

If I had to say something about May December, the new Natalie Portman Netflix movie, I’d say to go in expecting something bizarre. Profound and Oscar worthy wouldn’t be my phrases, but my idea of a good time differs from the next guy. It’s more of a dry martini than a lively whisky.

If I had to say something about dogs and cats, I’d say think twice before you bring more than two of each into your home. Most of the time, it’s a heartwarming sentiment that confirms you’re not a complete asshole and care about other creatures. But at 4:30 am, it’s an awful reminder that you overplayed your hand.

If I had to say something about drivers, I’d say Switzerland is the goal. Find a place in the middle of too fast and too slow, where sanity can be found. Show me a Mayor that can clean up the streets, as in making the roads safer to drive. If not, artificial intelligence will come into play. Imagine a robot riding shotgun and hitting you with a tiny hammer in the elbow every time you break three traffic laws at once.

Can you see it? I can see the end of this buffet. Edition #101 has dished its last plate of hot food and will close up until a review of Mann’s Christmas release posts.

The shop may be closing, but the exhibit is open 24/7. Take a look around the site as we near two years in existence, maybe telling a friend to subscribe. It’s almost too easy.

Photo Credit: Jeff Curry (USA Today Sports), NEON Pictures.