Buffa's Buffet, Vol. 85: Analyzing the Cardinals trades, saying goodbye to Angus, and 'Collateral' appreciation

The Princeton Heights loudmouth has checked back into the news desk.

Rewatching HBO’s The Newsroom got me thinking about how difficult and princess-like I would be if a television news network decided to put me in front of the camera every weeknight. I’d demand fresh coffee and skittles at insane hours, and would need a 24/7 sweat towel assistant. Makeup applications would have to be run through a sensitive skin steam bath test.

Look, you put me in a couple of layers, including a fancy-looking suit, and you’re going to see the levee fucking break. The paper towel slices that would be attached to my arm pits would have included some of the toughest fibers and material ever known to a white dude from Tholozan.

All of this to say that I appreciate being a loudmouth in a kind of peaceful Princeton Heights neighborhood. That’s where I technically live, according to the maps that I stare at far too often during a work week. Friends may urge me not to tell you where I live, but at this point, the paint dried a long time ago on me being incognito in St. Louis Hills.

Someday, not too far down the road, I will be taking long walks in Francis Park with my wife while I ramble on about the Birds. She will sip wine that others will think is cranberry juice, and we will smile at each other as life rattles on by. Blood pressure pill digested and coffee injected, it’ll be a sight to see. Until then, I will ramble on here. Here are five things that are on my mind right now.

Jeff Curry/USA Today Sports

5) Did the Cardinals get a decent return for Jordan Montgomery and Jordan Hicks?

Yes. They collected four pitchers, three of which are starters who can be plugged into the Memphis rotation for next year’s ascension. While there should be more trades to come over the next 24 hours, this was a good start. With each former Cardinal riding out an existing contract with no long term attachment, the return wasn’t going to be huge.

Thomas Saggese, who came over in the Toronto trade, is a 21 year old Jack of all trades position player who is hitting over .300 with 15 HR for Texas’ AA team. He seems to be a guy who can do what Tommy Edman and Brendan Donovan do for the team, at least in a couple years. Saggese is a type of player like those established MLB talents, so don’t write his production in pen just yet.

Tekoah Roby is a 22 year old starter who could have sat higher in the Rangers’ prospect rankings if it weren’t for injury concerns. He does have a very good fastball and curveball, and will head to Memphis. John King is a Major League reliever who will be plugged directly into the bullpen.

Getting Saggese and another Memphis bound pitcher in Adam Kloffenstein for Hicks was particularly strong, considering the team and player couldn’t come to an agreement on a contract extension. His wildness and inconsistency make him expendable, and also someone who could re-sign here in the offseason.

Sem Rebberse is a 21-year-old who will enter the Memphis Redbirds rotation. He came over in the Hicks trade, and is having a fine season at AA for Toronto. The 4.06 ERA isn’t thrilling, but the passive 1.17 WHIP and .212 batting average against is a nice touch.

Jack Flaherty, Donovan, Edman, Paul DeJong, and even Nolan Gorman still sit on the trade block. Those players will net the team MLB-ready starters potentially. This process was never going to be a single deadline fix and done. The rehab on this team will take longer, possibly stretching into next season’s deadline. Stop thinking of 2023 as a stopgap retool; it’s more like a 2-3 year process with how much fixing the Cardinals need.

St. Louis got a handful of prospects and a ready to go bullpen guy for two guys who will be free agents in November. No matter how you look at it, the trades are good. Bang for buck, without knowing how the future plays out, this is a patience acquisition. Jeff Passan and MLB Trade Rumors both called the haul for St. Louis, calling the price for Texas and Toronto to improve as “heavy.”

Keep going, Mr. Mozeliak. One has to think your job is on the line.

4) Could Reed Low kick your ass right now?

The answer is most likely yes. Low’s name doesn’t carry as much weight around town as Tony Twist and Kelly Chase, but he could probably at least hold his own with each of those tough guys. Low was a southpaw who didn’t mind throwing 30-35 punches inside a single fight.