South City Confessions: Get busy being authentically you or be content as a fake

We're only getting one shot at this thing, folks.

If you think of life as a video game, it makes a little more sense. Every year lived is like a level accomplished, plowing through all the obstacles that stand in our way. The work isn’t easy, especially in today’s rabid climate of hollow positivity, unfiltered negativity, and the ultimate destination of disbelief. Most people out there were natural born dreamers who have unfortunately seen their future and ambitions become a sea of doubt.

As my good friend, Maribel Smith, would urge you, be yourself now instead of when it’s too late. Being authentic isn’t about knowing how to correctly grocery-shop or picking the right day to wash your car. It’s about waking up and saying enough with trying to be a version of yourself that the world can tolerate. Since the world is going to absolute shit, be yourself and don’t look back.

Be yourself in how you treat people everyday. Cut them some slack. They may be driving through a Florida thunderstorm while you’re skiing down an easy Colorado slope. When Fast Eddie Felson said the ball rolls funny for everyone in billiards, he could have been talking about life. The person you’re about to launch into a tirade about in traffic-I am supremely guilty of this-could have just gotten the worst news and is working through it in unhealthy ways.

Life throws the hardest punches and it can handle the hardest ones in return. Whether you like it or not, it’s waiting for you every single day the front door is open.

Think about it. The second you leave the house and leave, your playing field is gone. Whatever mileage accrued, it’s happening on foreign territory. That’s not the same as enemy territory, but the familiarity is less and the possibilities for something endless are always present. Little to zero weirdness will come knocking at your door, but the outside world is like a warped Purge sequel right now.

Be yourself in how you carry yourself. Wear the makeup and clothes you like. Act like a GQ magazine photo shoot is happening and all the cameras are on you instead of the people who wish to tell you how to dress or act. If you think the combination of threads fits or the right lipstick or hair style rocks, just do it and don’t worry about the looks received. Those people don’t know you, so they don’t deserve a say in your wardrobe.

Be yourself in the way you eat. Gosh, it is the worst thing to hear someone instruct another how to consume food or what to place in their body. If they like pounding Big Macs and French fries, let them. That person won’t judge your green smoothie and one half of a toasted bagel. If you like smashing a slinger at Uncle Bill’s instead of the safer 2x2x2x2 entree, go for it; the former dish at least has the majority of the food groups included. Will eating a certain way shorten a life? Sure, but if the authenticity is there for them, let it be. Personally, a couple Arancini balls and a well-made salad can be the key to happiness--or a large pizza from Bud’s Pizza.

Be yourself in how you love. It’s smoother than silk to dote on and kiss on your husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, lover, or whatever. Do it in public without the open-mouth gladiator saliva transaction. Before you get up to go to the bathroom at a restaurant, kiss your wife. Before you go write an article that 455 people will read, kiss the wife. Humans need constant love like a cell phone needs a battery charge.

Be yourself in the teams you cheer for and the movies you like. Coming from a guy who rewatches his favorite movies like they’re literally going to disappear off the face of the Earth, take it from a film buff. If you root for two teams like my friend

HolyElle

, rock it. She likes baseball teams with birds on the logo, and that’s great. Being passionate about something doesn’t have to include a tap. Jean Claude Van Damme kicking his way through Timecop like he’s on Broadway (thank you, the late Ron Silver) may be my way of a good time and not yours, and it’s all gravy.

When boats float by each other by chance and there’s a connection, it’s the best. That person driving that boat came from a completely different perspective, home, and lifestyle. Still, you somehow found a way to connect. As Sean told an embattled genius named Will Hunting 27 years ago, that’s the good stuff.

Lastly, just be yourself as much as you can without disrupting others’ lives. Scream, yell, kiss, fuck, and do it your way. If it worked for Frank Sinatra, it’ll work for you.

In short, live life like the late Salvatore Imperiale, a guy who could cook Italian food like no other and captivate an audience with a short story. He wore shorts that looked like underwear and suspenders while sipping a martini and making enough cheese garlic bread to stuff a horse. It was his way and it worked. That’s the way to live. In honor of the five year mark since his untimely death, live like Sam and you’ll be alright.

Thanks for reading this rambling pile of prose chaos and have a great Sunday.