The Rant: Declining star players, pity for 'The Crow', Kamala time, and early fall weather bliss

Remakes should only happen if the original stunk like stale cheese.

It’s 54 degrees outside, Kamala Harris has accepted the Democratic nomination, and Friday has arrived. Let the latest rant begin. Old fashioned, unnumbered, unfiltered, and quite frankly an open stream of consciousness.

Here’s the hardest thing about watching the demise of former star athletes, Paul Goldschmidt and Nolan Arenado, this year: They’re both genuine good guys who are absolutely doing their best to get back what was lost. Criticizing their play isn’t easy nor fun, because you want to see them succeed, and it helps the Cardinals win more baseball games. But that’s where the sympathy ends. After all, it’s a business.

If the time calls for it, there has to be no hesitation sitting either one of them down the stretch, especially if it helps the development of the future product. Since Nolan Arenado redeemed himself over the past two games in smashing a walk-off grand slam and a key single off the Brewers this week, he may get a small reprieve here. Unlike Goldschmidt, he’s been functional in regards to OPS and keeping his batting average semi respectable throughout the season. The 19 home runs are what keeps Goldschmidt worthwhile, because the 143 strikeouts are definitely not ideal.

Goldschmidt had a measly single in five at-bats Wednesday night, failing to show the pop required to change a game. He struck out for the second night in a row on a Devin Williams changeup. Any well thrown off speed pitch seems to fold his bat right up. He’s barely over .230 and his OPS isn’t near .700, two marks that a 25 million dollar first baseman should be able to produce with reasonable ease.

When asked yesterday about Luken Baker, who smoked a game-tying two-run home run last night in the seventh inning, Oli Marmol admitted wanting to see more of him against lefties. After a 2-0 lead became a 4-2 Brewers lead, St. Louis got back to work, scoring eight runs in the final two four innings. Baker got that going, homering off a lefty.

Question: Why start him only against lefties? That’s not a solid shot, even if it makes sense for the sabe crowd. Are we raising platoon players for a living now? It’s a tired rhetoric that won’t die: starting older players who are both expensive and carry the feelings of a young teen when it comes to not playing-at least that’s what the Cardinals make it look like. Tony La Russa benched Scott Rolen, and the third baseman pouted. While I don’t think Goldy would whine, there isn’t a good chance he sees much of the bench, which he seems to be immune to.

Why? It’s old and stupid to continue such a cuddling position for such a grown man. If he’s not producing, play Luken Baker against lefties and some righties. Since Nolan Gorman could get to the Mendoza line and strike out 151 times before being demoted this week, Baker deserves more than situational hitting. Don’t worry about his clock either; he’s 27 years old and eclipsed any lesson in Memphis. The team should give serious credibility to Baker by giving him a longer look, even if it costs Goldschmidt reps. If Jordan Walker could see reps at first base next year or Alec Burleson, bat them there too. Burleson started there Thursday, and got on base three times.

When did platooning hitters become like lefty specialists back in the day? Cut that shit out.

Cut bad remakes out, too. The upcoming release of The Crow, a movie done so right and the epitome of the late Brandon Lee’s legacy, carries all the positivity of a wet fart. With no disrespect to the talented Bill Skarsgard, this looks like a giant pile of steaming crap that never should have been made. What’s the purpose? It can’t be money. Reviews have been awful, so don’t expect juicy box office stats from a movie that looks like a teenager on way too much sugar dreamt up the reimagining.

Alex Proyas’ original wasn’t perfect, but it fit the era of its release and showcased a fine cast, including the angelic Lee. All the work done to finish that film after the unfortunate death of the star turned out, and it’s a cult classic. One thing Hollywood doesn’t understand is the need for a remake. A makeover is only necessary when the original isn’t up to snuff.

Is Mrs. Harris up for the ride of becoming the next President of the United States? Let’s hope so, because anything out of her mouth doesn’t sound as loony as Donald Trump. From a blatant disrespect of war veterans to tearing the rights away from women and future voters, he and JD Vance make up a popular new band called the Bleach Boys.

But wait, her detractors say… wasn’t she drunk when speaking here, or what do her policies say? Well, she just accepted the nomination and is clearly allowing Donnybrook to fall on his face more and more in the public’s eye. Her policies, the most important ones, are to delete the bad breath that her opponent has left on the trail and the old man fumes left by current President Joe Biden.

I’m all in favor of keeping an old white guy out of the White House, except for the lovable Tim Walz. Whether it’s the loving grace he shows his neurodivergent son on stage or getting mocked by Barack Obama for wearing certain sweaters, he’s the cool and nice neighbor who mows your side lawn because he was already mowing his own lawn. He hops on stage, and comes off like a beam of light instead of puke breath Vance.

If you’re voting for anything this fall, vote for decency. Give me one reason why Trump has your back, or that he won’t just pour more gasoline on the growing abyss of fire that is our country. Show me like I’m a five-year-old, or vote for Harris. For many unsavory reasons, the racist portion of Trump’s posse won’t even give her the time of day. Again, vote for decency.

Decency is all this guy who rides a scooter around St. Louis at times wants from fellow drivers. Have you ever gotten the feeling that every car around you hates your guts? I wouldn’t frame it as a “run that man over” kind of disdain, but it’s definitely there. Maybe they’re mad that I could buy one of those big trucks with all the money I saved on gas. After all, it only takes $2.50 to fill up my scooter. Zipping around on that thing isn’t the safest, but being inside of a car doesn’t really cap off the security either.

The fun part is flying around the city and putting yourself into these imagined action sequences. Can you hear the trailer guy now?

“One man… on a scooter… seeking justice after the death of his magnolia tree. This fall, Princeton Heights will feel the chill of justice from a BIG guy on a scooter. Are you ready?!”

The poster would just be a large shot of my beard, which has been trimmed by the lovely Mrs. Buffa. It’s not Big Papi/Marmol trimming, where my initials are on one cheek. Think of it more like taking a few inches off the hedges of a large bush.

One more thing before I head off to work on my endangered species called a Yamaha: Don’t forget about David Fincher’s The Killer. Released last year to good reviews and some fanfare, it’s a beast of its own unique making. Borrowing hitman movie traits and inserting them into a story where one bad job spirals out for a perfectionist killer (the outstanding Michael Fassbender), the movie is populated with his cynical voiceover about the state of the world and how it blends with his profession.

“Of the people who place their faith in the inherent goodness of mankind, I must ask… based on what exactly?”

Have a good Friday. Once again, I can’t believe this week already came and went, but that’s life. Moving, constantly.